


Not quite as the Scrolls have foretold

by neverending_shenanigans



Category: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Alternate Universe - Skyrim Fusion, Crack Treated Seriously, Gen, Modern Character in Skyrim
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-08
Updated: 2019-04-08
Packaged: 2020-01-06 23:50:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18398867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neverending_shenanigans/pseuds/neverending_shenanigans
Summary: A series of out-of-order scenes in which Darcy Lewis and Jane Foster happen to be thrown into a parallel universe, in which ...... the Avengers are the Companions and Jarl Odin is a dick... the Thieves Guild is full of insects and has a bad marketing scheme... Darcy happens to be able to shout really well, apparently (where is the college credit for that)... Jane really is not half as interested in these Daedric-Princes as they are in her... and other such shenanigans.While there is a lose narrative, mostly this is just me throwing MCU characters into the setting of Skyrim and seeing what happens.





	1. Dirty paws (and the creatures of snow)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [amusewithaview](https://archiveofourown.org/users/amusewithaview/gifts).



> Lots of kudos to amusewithaview who inspired a lot of this when she streamed the game. This first chapter practically wrote itself, because no one can look at Vilkas' and Farkas' make-up and tell me they DONT get Winter Soldier vibes. 
> 
> Also, she has this habit if adding really good tags to everything so she basically threw plotbunnies at me and i'm just rolling with it, for now.

„Are those two at it again?“

 

Natasha doesn’t turn to look the young boy sliding up next to her, basket on his hip, excitement in his words. She scoffs, eyes fixed on the two warriors circling each other. She’s evaluating James’ reflexes. “Has a day passed since their joining without their brawling? They’re all bark, those two.”

The boy laughs, briefly, before catching himself. Natasha sees him wince from the corner of her eyes as a particularly vicious blow hits Sam’s cheek. “The Harbinger has forbidden me from patching them up.”

It is Natasha’s turn to laugh. “That’s punishing us with their whining, not them. And as if Steve is any better.”

The boy remains silent at her remark, clearly enthralled with the fighting. She cannot blame him. Sam is a lithe fighter, quick and precise. And while James might have lost a limp, he still packs quite the punch. Still, she tears her gaze from the two males wrestling to look at the lad to her side. How many winters had he seen? Clint’s words from the night before echoed in her mind, on their way to return to Jorrvaskr after their hunt. She wondered if Tony really had plans to turn the boy into one of them. “How are you, Peter?”

This garners her confused look. “Me? Why?”

Natasha smiles, briefly. “I heard from a bird that you scaled the rooftops last night. Spying on that serving girl in Breezehome, maybe?”

Peter sputters. “Wh-what? No! I- I just like looking at the moon! Is that a crime?” He turns. “Oh, I think Thor called for me.” A fumbling lie, but he crosses through the hall in big strides to where Thor is engaged in a conversation with their blacksmith, Valkyrie.

The large warrior claps a hand on Peter’s shoulder in greeting and has the boy staggering for a moment. Sometimes Natasha wonders if the one-eyed warrior’s bold claim to be a descendant of Ysgramor is actually true. Steve certainly thought so. Then again, it most likely doesn’t matter. Half Whiterun is convinced of the tale and it has garnered them a large amount of popularity in recent years. Their hall is prospering. It is what Nick would have wanted from them.

 

 

Then a sharp whistling sound catchers her attention. Her head turns instinctively, and she finds Clint, sitting in the roof beams, one leg dangling down. He nods towards the door to the backyard, which had been left open so that the servants had an easier time carrying in the firewood.

Instead of servants, however, there were two young women, dressed in linen rags. They were peaking in, trying to stay out of view. And they would have, if not for some of their… special talents.

Natasha notices the marred lines on their wrists, where they had clearly been bound. One of them is leaning slightly on the other, and her foot looks like it had been bleeding. Their brown hair is cacked with dirt and leaves. They are whispering among themselves. They look like beggars, not people seeking them out for a contract. Maybe refugees from the fighting between Imperials and Stormcloaks. They’ve had some of them in Whiterun.

Natasha looks back up at Clint, eyebrows raised. He tilts his head, in question. She looks around, but no one else has noticed the women. So she sighs, readying herself to make her way over to them. But again, Clint whistles. He has one finger to his lips, and gestures for her to listen. So she does, focusing on the two women, filtering out James’ and Sam’s bickering.

“Even so, I doubt they can help us,” the older one said, voice tense. “They look different.”

“ _We_  look different. Who cares? Look, they still look pretty capable to me.”

“Doesn’t this worry you? At all?”

“Jane.  _Janey-Jane_. I am scared shitless. We were snapped into existence in a fantasy world with dragons and almost executed. Of course I’m fucking worried. But that is T _hor_.”

Natasha looks up at Clint. ‘Dragons?’ he mouthes at her. She shrugs. There are no dragons in Skyrim. Have not been for centuries. But they have clearly come here with a purpose if they know of Thor.

Clint moves on the beams, so that he is in a crouching position now. He looks like he is ready to drop down on them if they make one false move. Natasha, too, thinks that now was maybe a good chance to make clear that they had been noticed.

 

Before she can say anything, however, she sees Steve step up behind the two women, the pelt of a bear slung over his shoulder, dried blood on the side of his face and stuck in his beard. A grizzly sight. Natasha cannot fault the younger woman the strangled sound escaping from her throat as Steve moves to step past them.

“You are welcome to our hall,” he says kindly, unfathomed by their reaction, “whether you seek our help or the comfort of our hearth. Don’t be afraid.”

His voice carried, causing the rest of the Companions to turn towards the door, where he stands waiting for a reaction.

“Captain Am-,” the younger one starts to speak, but the older one reaches out quickly, clasping a hand over her mouth.

“You are very kind. We are just looking for directions. We are to deliver a message to the Jarl of Whiterun from Riverwood.”

Again, Natasha and Clint exchange looks. These women seem stranger the more they talked.  Who could miss Dragonsreach? It is towering the city, even by night.

Steve doesn’t let on if he thinks these two women strange in any way. “From Riverwood? By whom, if you do not mind me asking. I am familiar with the town.”

The younger one speaks up first. “Alvor, the blacksmith.”

Steve nods. “Ah. Yes. I know of him. He showed me kindness, once. If you are friends to him, you are friends to us. But the Jarl will likely have retired for the night and would not see you now. I have business with Jarl Odin myself, I can show you there come morning.”

“Odin?” The younger woman speaks, sounding dismayed.

This earned her an elbow to the side by her friend. Natasha can barely hold back a laugh when the older one suddenly curtsied slightly. Do they take Steve for a lord? “Thank you. We would appreciate that.”

Steve himself seems amused, as he waves for Peter to come over to them. Thor follows, clearly curious of the strangers. “Peter, we have guests for the night. Can you show them to a room? And have the servants bring them some water to wash up, and a maybe a change of clothes.”

“We do not wish to impose,” the older one speaks again, hesitantly. This time she is elbowed to the side.

“Oh, yes, we do wish. Please. I would kill for some food, to be honest.”

This makes Thor laugh, at least. It is hard not to notice how both of them immediately fixed their gazes on him. And how the younger one reaches for the older one, who has her firsts balled up. “No need to kill, my friends. You shall have a full belly tonight.” He gestures for them to follow him, and they both do, not even bothering to look back on Peter or Steve. It worries her.

Natasha looks up to where Clint has been a moment ago, but her companion is already making his way across the beams, following the group. She smiles to herself, and then moved across the room to stand next to Steve.

 

He briefly looks at her, his face less warmth and kindness now, and more dark shadows and edges. “You heard them?”

“I did.” When she notices his frown, she cannot help but nudge him slightly, with her shoulder. “You don’t think it true, do you?”

“Which part?”

“Dragons.”

Steve pauses, and then shrugs. “There are rumors.”

“There always are.”

Suddenly James is at Steve’s other side. Natasha has not noticed him stepping up to them. “They smell like they walked through fire.”

“That they did. But they also smelled of dead skeevers. Doesn’t turn them into them.”

Steve remains silent for a moment, then he glances at James. “Is their trail fresh enough?”

James nods.

Steve sighs. Then looks to Natasha. “Follow it. Not too far. Just enough to confirm their story.”

Natasha sighs. Dragons. As if trying to confirm or deny the existence of dragons was worth their time. She thought it far more likely that those two were followers of some daedric cult, or sent by the silver hand. But fine. If Steve thought it worth their time, they would have to sniff out the truth.


	2. So what’s the point of robbery (when nothing is worth taking)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Darcy and Jane enter Riften.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me just say one thing about this chapter: That one line that is canon in this chapter is hotly debated. Namely, amusewithaview has opinions on it. So this is basically one chapter around this whole line, i guess?  
> Also, please look up the reference for the chapter title, you will not regret it.

“I don’t like this place,” a girl loudly declares. “In fact, I think this is the worst so far. Let’s go back to Thor and just wait for Heimdall to show up and beam us out of here.”

Luis peeks around the corner. There are two women coming closer to his position, not exactly looking like they are made of coin. The leather armor they are in looks ill-fitting and yet worn. One of them, the loud one, has a bow strapped to her back. The other has a staff. He wonders if they could be a target. Not exactly looking the skilled warriors, not super rich. That is about it, right?

“Shhh,” the other woman hushes her, looking around to see if someone has noticed them. Luis moves back just in time, but carefully continues to listen. “Let’s just find this old man and get this over with quickly.”

Old man? Oh, by the gods. He hopes those two aren’t just some women looking for a relative. He hates pulling in normal people. But a guy has to earn his meal these days, and Riften doesn’t exactly leave many options for how to earn it anymore. You can’t steal from an empty pocket.

“Fine. Should we get to the tavern then? I’m hungry. Maybe someone has miraculously heard of our guy in there.”

There is a moment’s pause, and Luis is worried that they did enter the Wasp and the Ant and that he missed his chance. But then he hears them moving much closer. “If we keep resting in taverns we will be out of coin soon, Darcy. They don’t take credit cards around here.”

That’s his cue! Luis hastily tries for a suave lean against the wall, as he’s seen the boss do so many times and waits for them to come around the corner. Then he coughs. “Your pockets are a little light, ladies?”

The two women pause, and turn to look at him. The older one has suspicion written all over her face. “I’m sorry, what?”

Ah, dang it. What was the other line he was supposed to use again? “Never done an honest day’s work in your life for the coin you’re carrying, eh senorita?”

The loud one opens her mouth, in… shock. Or anger? But instead of replying, she gestures at him and looks at her friend. “See? What the fuck. What the fuck!” She starts counting down on her fingers. “We’re here like… what, five minutes? And we already ran into guards trying to scam us, were lectured about corrupt politics, some weirdo was up in our face just for entering, some guy was getting threatened blatantly right in front of us and now this dude insults us for whatever fucking reason. I am done.”

Luis blinks. This is not going his way. He scratches the back of his head. So much for Darren and his clever ideas on how to run the Thieves Guild. How had he put it? With these lines, even a loser like you can trick people into doing our dirty business. Back when Scott had run the Guild, they’d at least been honest to the people they were cheating. Nothing of that business with the Ten Rings or that Killian Clan.

“Look, look,” he tries again. “Sorry ‘bout that. Didn’t mean it as an insult. I just thought you guys sounded like you need some coin. And I could use a little help. It’s not exactly honest, but nothing is here. I swear, if you help me on this, I’ll help you, too. I can help you find anyone you’re looking for. Riften’s not a good place to be in without friends.”

The younger one laughs, shakes her head, and turns as if to leave. Surprisingly, it’s the older one who grabs her friend by the arm and pulls her back and makes a step towards him.

“Jane?” The younger one sounds utterly confused, but the older one ignores it, for the moment. Instead, she focuses on him. And damn, that’s a real scary expression on her face. She really reminds him of Hope somehow. He’s glad he didn’t try Darren’s other lines on her. “Why would you need us then? If you claim to want to help us, shouldn’t you have some friends to help you already?”

“Oh, I do! I do have friends. It’s just complicated.”

Jane, as the older woman is apparently called, makes another step towards him. “I am listening.”

She fully ignores her friends huffed annoyance. “Are you kidding me?  _Why_?!”

Well, okay. Honesty it is, then. He always liked honesty better. “See, I was at a mead tasting with my friend Kurt and he crossed this guy a little, because of the honey. Kurt and I don’t like the mead and Kurt insulted this guy Killian because his honey tastes like Skeever piss. So he was locked up for saying the truth.  So I went to visit him with my friend Dave and Kurt has made a new friend; this Khajit called Inigo who was locked up for some moonsugar business but really that’s just racism. Everyone thinks Khajit are involved in drugs but some of them are the friendliest people I’ve ever met. ”

The younger one looks like she is ready to strangle him, so he speaks a little faster.

“And this guy Inigo was locked up many times, and he says he was locked up with our other friend Scott only a few months ago. But Darren says Scott is dead because he betrayed us and he and Hope killed each other, and this is why Hank, her father and our old boss, is mourning. Pym was a great boss, but he got weird when his wife, Janet, disappeared. Janet was a real legend, she founded the Tavern here, too. Riften was a different place. But now Darren runs it and he has this side deal going on and now we don’t do our own stuff no more, but we do what the Ten Rings want and that’s lousy. But Scott was this good guy, see, and he has a little daughter and he would never just leave her so I don’t really think that he killed her and Dave and Kurt don’t think so either. So now we have to find out if Scott is really alive, right? Of course, Dave has to skip town to find Scott, but Darren wants us to forget about it and Hank is too busy mourning so that really makes it all a little difficult right now so we need money and more members so Dave and I can disappear for a little while to find Scott and for Darren not to be too suspicious of us.”

“What did you just….?” Jane frowns.

Luis frowns too. “Do you want me to start over?”

“Dear lord, no!” The younger one exclaims.

“No, I mean… did you mention Hank Pym?” She looks towards her friend. “I’ve heard of him before.  _At home.”_

Something is going on between those two that Luis is sure he has no business in. But that’s not what matters to him right now. He doesn’t even care about them knowing Hank. He needs to find Scott, and this is the first step in that direction they’ve made in weeks. “Yeah, no wonder. He was a big name. A genius. When our guild was known and feared. People called him…” he leans forward a little, towards them. “The Ant.”

They don’t look half as impressed as that as he had hoped they would. But at least they’re not walking away. Or calling for the guards. “He was known for something else, too. His research,” the Jane-one says now, her expression intent. “Maybe he knows how we could get home.”

Luis smiles. “Pym knows every place in Skyrim, I swear. I’ll introduce you!”

The younger one shrugs. “Urgh, fine. It’s not like we have plenty of options, so far.”

So he smiles at them, holding out his hand. “So? Are you two in? You help me with a little business, and I help you find your old man. And to some coin. And some friends, maybe, if you want to. Sounds good?”

Both women grimace, but then they nod. The younger one still looks like she’d much rather be doing anything else. In Luis book, that is actually fine by him. They could use some honest thieves in their Guild again. She kracks her knuckles. “Okay, what are we supposed to do?”

Luis gestures over to the market. “I’m going to cause a distraction, you’re going to liberate someone off their silver ring in the box under that stall. Then drop it in the pocket of…” he looks around, and finds their target. “That man’s pocket. Simple as that.”

“’Simple as that?’ How are we supposed the  _open_  the box?”

Luis pulls out a lock pick and holds it out for them. “You know how to use those?”

Both have a look at it. Surprisingly, the Jane-one nods. “I think I know how they work, in theory. I use similar tools for building my machines.”

“Good! Don’t break it, it’s the only one I have right now.” He looks up at the sky. “And I think we best do it right now, senorita. Wait for my speech!”

“Oh great, another one,” the younger one mutters, but both of them move towards the market. Luis can’t believe he really convinced someone to do this. He better not screw it up.

Then, it’s only a matter of talking real loud about falmer-blood elixir. He doesn’t really have the time to observe what they are doing, but he notices Dave at the other side of the market give him a thumbs up.  This is the start of a great heist, he just knows it.


End file.
